Cowboy Music

I have never been much of a fan of Country music, especially it’s latest incarnation. But you have to give a tip of the hat to the old school country music songwriters. They had a great sense of humor, and they really knew how to turn a phrase.

Cat-A-Lanche

A few years ago, a comedian named Rich Hall was briefly famous for his creation of “Sniglets”. A Singlet is defined as, “Any word that doesn't appear in the dictionary, but probably should". Sniglets are a clever form of word play often involving a pun of some sort. I have written a number of my own Sniglets over the years. One of my favorites is “Cat-A-lanche”. Allow me to explain. There was a time when I lived in a two story townhouse with my first wife. We had a bunch of critters back then. We had two dogs, four adult cats, and five kittens. Our house was in a constant state of happy chaos. For example; whenever the doorbell rang, all nine cats would run down the stairs en masse to see who was at the door. This was really fun to watch but a little hazardous if you happened to be navigating the staircase at that time. I found that the best strategy was to stand still, hold the banister, and watch as the river of cats flowed around and past me. I named this occurrence, a "Cat-A-Lanche". Good times.

Rude Dolphins

I have not been feeling very intellectual lately, perhaps it is due to the nutty weather we're having. So, the obvious route to take for this week's post is a little low-brow humor. Besides- it's just bodily functions, and I'm using dolphins so that makes it cool. Ben Franklin once said that if flatulence was odorless, we would treat it no differently than a sneeze or a burp. A wise man indeed.

Foundling

I have always had a great interest and fascination with monkeys and apes. When I was but a wee lad, I really wanted a pet monkey--but what kid doesn't? When I was in Kindergarten, our classroom had a kid-sized play kitchen and living room. We used this space to play "House", with my classmates filling the roles of a Mom, Dad, siblings, aunt, uncle, etc. There was limited room so not all the kids in my class could play at once. I created a role for myself as the family pet, "Monkey". This way I would be included anytime the other kids wanted to play "House". Everybody liked Monkey and it gave me the freedom to act silly, misbehave a little, and get away with it completely.

Growing up I read all the Tarzan books, saw the movies, and watched the TV show. I wanted to be the Lord of the Apes! I was a big fan of the "Planet of the Apes" movies too. When I was a teenager I read Jane Goodall's book My Friends the Wild Chimpanzees which inspired me to become a Primatologist. I studied everything I could find on the subject of primates and their behaviour. In a few years I had amassed a knowledge base in preparation for college. As you can guess, I did not become a world famous primatologist. Despite all the camping I had done as a Boy Scout, perhaps the jungle life was not for me after all.